* If money is the root of all evil, why do churches beg for it?
* Doesn't a lightning rod atop a church show a lack of faith?
* Why do we say, "heads up" when we want someone to duck for cover?
* What was Captain Hook's name before he lost his hand and had to get a hook?
* I saw an ad the other day for caskets (coffins), it said, "Lifetime Guarantee". Huh?
* When French people cuss, do they say, "Pardon my English"?
* Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time?
* Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat "Macaroni"? For that matter, why did he name the feather in the first place?
* Who was the first person to see a cow, and say, "I think I'll squeeze those dangly thingies under there, and drink what comes out."?
* Who was the first person to say, "Do you see that chicken over there? I think I'll eat the first big thing to come out of it's butt."?
* Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking place if you are not handicapped, but it's OK to use a handicapped toilet?
* Why is it that "Chopsticks", is the easiest song to play on the piano, but the hardest utensil to eat with?
* Why can't you get a tan on the palms of your hands?
* If you were in space, and had a compass, which way would it point?
* Did Noah have woodpeckers on the arc? And if he did, why didn't he eventually sink?